Griller’s Gadget Guide- Bit@h Edition

Summer is here and I know that there are a ton of you bit@hes that have been cooped up in that kitchen for far too long. So you are going to trade in those pots and pans for spatulas and tongs, and head yonder to the yards of back. Soon the smells of tasty murder will be wafting through neighborhoods all across ‘murica and lucky for you, I have done some research into finding you the best gadgets available to make your summer grilling experiences that much more pleasurable. No, no. No need to thank me.

Nothing sucks worse than having charred memories of the food that has come before on your juicy, plump wad of meat. So clean those damn grills before you cook. What better way than with this:

Motorized Grill Brush with Steam Cleaning Power

Like a GD swiss army knife for the grill! Start off with the bottle opener so you can get nice and toasty as you use the serrated knife to cut your meat and fingers. And make sure you keep drinking so that you ensure the sharp hook pokes not one, but both of your drunken eyes out while you wrangle your steaks. Don’t forget the spatula so you can flip your burgers. We recommend safety gloves, goggles and a suit of armor while you use this gem of a tool.

BBQ Hooker 1009R 4-in-1 Grilling Tool, Right Handed

Dropping morsels of tasty murder will be a thing of the past when you get your hands on these turner tongs. Never use the 10 second rule again!

Outset QV57 Verde Multipurpose Stainless-Steel Claw-Style Barbecue Tongs with Bamboo Handles

Use this amazing invention to stuff your ground up dead animal flesh with some tasty cheese, veggies or anything your heart desires!

Cuisinart CSBP-100 3-in-1 Stuffed Burger Press

Never burn your precious little hands again when adding your “Get in the Kitchen, Bit@hes” brand spice rubs and blends to your meat. Use this spice arm to safely apply that spicy goodness.

Mr. Bar-B-Q 40027X The Spice Arm

What’s better than being able to add some amazing smoked flavor to the dead animals you’ve chosen to grill to perfection. Now you can with this smoker box.

GrillPro 00150 Cast Iron Smoker Box

Who doesn’t need a headlamp strapped to their head as they grill out at night or at a campsite? Just make sure not to point your face too close to the flames.

Ultra Bright LED Headlamp Flashlight – Complete Lifetime Guarantee! Light & Comfortable With Fully Dimmable White Light, Red, And Strobe Light Ideal For Camping, Running, Hunting, Reading, DIY, More! Water Resistant with 3 AAAs Included!

How about serving up some grilled pizza for those guests who may like something without a face?

Weber 8836 Gourmet BBQ System Pizza Stone with Carry Rack

A must have for those grilled veggies! Stick those mother fu@%ers right in these grill clips and lay them right atop your metal inferno.

Charcoal Companion Stainless Grill Clips / Set 4 – CC5134

Never drip your special sauce with this clever basting jar.

BODUM Bistro Sauce pot with Silicone Basting Brush White

In doing my research, this Himalayan Salt Block seemed to pop up…a lot. People swear it gives your meat or veggie that added mineral salt taste that is, pardon the expression you animals that gave your lives for our tasty enjoyment, to die for.

Round Himalayan Salt Grilling Blocks Double Pack Sale!

Make sure you cook those large, juicy cylinders of meat to perfection with a hot dog roller!

Cuisinart CHDR-225 Hot Dog Roller